A little all-encompassing radio update (with shout-outs!)

So, it occurred to me that it's been a while since I really got everybody up to speed on the current broadcasting schedule of the company (and I use that term loosely) I've started called "Second Team Productions."

The name "Second Team Productions" came to me in a dream. I think it came about from a time that I joked that our team (me, Paige, Ed, Jeff ... even all of the support we get from Steve, Foobs, my family, etc.) might not be your starters, but we'd be a great backup squad.

Hence ... Second Team Productions.

Anyway, we're really busy lately. And I don't even mean in that, "I'm not interested in working on Friday so I have to look busy" kind of way!

Happy Hour on TalkRadioX (live at 2 p.m. Sunday, replay at 5 p.m. Monday and 10 a.m. Tuesday) has actually started to gain some steam and I couldn't be happier. I'm working (read: harassing them through MySpace) on getting the listeners from The Show That Never Ends (8 p.m. Sunday) to tune in a little earlier because I think they'd totally be impressed with how different and great the setup is over at TalkRadioX compared to the things we deal with at NowLive. It's just a first-class operation from start to finish and I'm so lucky to be surrounded by such talented and fun people.

Lest I be called a "shameless self-promoter," here's some promotional love to my people. These are the shows you should be checking out religiously on TalkRadioX:

* The Radio Dan Show (8 p.m. Monday through Thursday, 9 p.m. Sunday) -- Radio Dan and Intern Jessica. It's movies, TV, entertainment and all of it entertaining. I love these guys. I could listen for hours. I do, actually.

* The Live Test Show ... YAYYY! (9 p.m. Monday through Friday) -- Hosted by Antubert with Tyler Hollywood. All sorts of fun going on in that hour! Plus, it's inevitable that Cory and Mr. Justin are going to show up at some point to rain Skittles.

* B-Dub at Night (10 p.m. Monday through Thursday, midnight Friday) -- A little show that I may or may not be the executive producer of ... But definitely interesting, controversial and, well, it has porn stars. You'll just have to check it out.

* Ground Zero Radio (6 p.m. Saturday) -- eWrestling, a little of this and that, hosted by resident badass Tyler Hollywood. I still don't know what eWrestling is. I'm waiting for that explanation.

* Steppin' to the Bad Side (11 p.m. Saturday) -- more Tyler Hollywood badassness. I would encourage you to stick around for the 2 a.m. to 3 a.m. hour. Seriously. Yes. I just said "2 a.m. to 3 a.m. hour."

* Steppin' to the Bad Side Power Hour (11 p.m. Monday through Thursday) -- seriously, Tyler, you got nothin' else to do?! You're cutting into my trash TV time with all of this! ::laughs::

Over on BlogTalkRadio, our friends at SportFellas are about to launch SportFellas Radio. The day and time are forthcoming, but you won't want to miss it. It's going to be a great roundtable on sports, pop culture and anything else that comes around. I'm one of the roundtable co-hosts as the resident chick in the cheap seats. That and I'm probably the only person who can talk NHL and has a penchant for minor league sporting events.

So, really ... that's why I'm not sleeping much these days once you throw in the graphic production side of Second Team. I'm always listening and learning, writing, designing, thinking of new ideas, reading reading reading, bouncing ideas off those more awesome than we are. It's an ever-evolving process.

How awesome is this, though? Paige, because she's the most awesome badass in the world, gave me an external hard drive for Christmas that has almost any kind of sound effect I could ever want, so you'll have to wait to see when they make appearances. And to that, I have to ask her, "Who shit on the coats?"

But, you know, I don't think I'd trade the insomnia in for anything. I'm actually having what could be described as the time of my life right now with all of this insanity. :)

The art of the "how not to ..." (under pressure)

Me (on the phone): "You ARE an expert! You spend more time in a bar than anybody I've ever known."
Sweet Ann (from across the cubicle): "Tell Ed I said hi."

I'm a communicator. For a living, even. For a living and for a "hobby." (I put "hobby" in quotes because at this point, it's like a part-time job that I love and don't collect a paycheck.)

OK, so maybe I'm not the best at doing it with tact. I would just call that "my direct nature" and "brutal honesty."

Anyway, I spend 40-some hours a week getting paid at the ol' AutoTrader and then probably another 10 to 20 doing various Internet radio projects and blogging. Sometimes the blog gets hosed, though. It's not because the blog is any less important or I'm not interested in it, it's just something I know will always be there for me when I'm ready to come home. Kind of like a cat.

Like this one.

Inky. She's ill-tempered, but rather loyal.

But, I digress.

I generally do pride myself on having pretty good communication skills. I'd like to think I'm outgoing, expressive, thoughtful ... all of those things. But you know what I plain suck at? I mean, I'm so bad at it, I could host a seminar on "how not to ... ."

"Managing Emotions Under Pressure."

I was looking for a show topic for this week's Happy Hour (the NEW show we're doing at 2 p.m. on Sundays on TalkRadioX) and a brochure for a one-day seminar with that title fell right into my path.

To tie it all together -- first, a little bit about Happy Hour!

This is a new, exciting project for us. For a couple of months, I was a co-host on The James Madison Show on TalkRadioX and I got to know a little bit about the operation and its people. Because of some technical issues, I wasn't able to keep doing the JM Show, but they offered (because they're such great, awesome guys) to talk to the people at TRX to see if I could have a slot. Fortunately, the people who make those decisions caught me on an "A-Game" day, and offered up the slot.

After waffling for a while on a day and time, we all finally settled on 2 p.m. Sunday.

We settled on 2 p.m. Sunday at about 6 p.m. Saturday night.

This ... is where a seminar on "Managing Emotions Under Pressure" would have come in handy.

At this point, all I had was the graphic you see above, no audio promos cut, a rudimentary knowledge of HOW to use the audio software and a co-host I couldn't locate. It's 7:15 p.m. the night before launch.

And here, as they say, is where pressure kicks in.

Ordinarly, I'm very good at meeting deadlines under pressure. I do it every single week. It's part of my job. But as I sat there that Saturday night looking for various bits of audio to string together into a show opener with a program I only kind of know something about, I started to feel my head pound. My chest tightened a little. I was hot. And I was on the verge of panic. These were people I wanted to impress. I wanted the new show to be flawless. I wanted nothing less than perfection.

I finally put something together I somewhat liked. At this point, I couldn't really see straight, my head was throbbing and I felt a little sick in the pit of my belly knowing that in all of the work on production, none of it included ... a topic. I e-mailed the finished audio product to my co-host (who lives five and a half hours from Charleston in an awesome little party town we like to call Harrisburg, Pa.) and said, "Call me when you get this. I want to know what you think of it."

Shortly after midnight, I really could have used the knowledge that would have been gleaned from "Managing Emotions Under Pressure."

Me: Hi.
Nightman (sneaky and mean): Hey.
M: Did you listen?
N: Yeah. It's a little bit choppy.

... BOOM!!

What happened in the next few minutes could only be described as someone who did NOT "Manage Emotions Under Pressure." In a matter of sheer seconds, I became my father.

"Fine. You don't like it, I just e-mailed you the software. Have at it."

"You know, what the hell have YOU done to make this happen? Oh, wait. That's right. Nothing."

"Do you have any idea what it's like to spend four hours trying to put something like that together?"

I failed, clearly, to "Manage Emotions Under Pressure." Every time he said "calm down" I got angrier. When he tried to tell me that after listening to it a couple more times, he really liked it, I told him I didn't want to hear it. I stopped listening. I didn't let him talk. I started crying. I started attacking him for about everything I could think of.

I became everything I hate about people who can't handle pressure.

To his credit, he softened his tone and tried to get me to just walk away from it for the night and go to sleep. We're close enough to know those little quirks about each other -- I'm not very easy to deal with if I'm frustrated. Add fatigue and a migraine on top of it, and you're playing with a stick of C4 (that might be sparking) in one hand and a match in the other.

Is it right? No. Hell no it's not right. I had no reason to act that way. I was under pressure and rather than letting rational behavior win, I flipped out like a hormonal teenage girl.

Fortunately, when 2 p.m. Sunday hit, it didn't matter. The opening was nailed. The show was tight. We got lots of feedback and compliments and we ended it right on time (there's math involved!) even when I realized 20 seconds to cutoff that I hadn't wrapped up. (... oops.)

So, I managed under pressure. Maybe not my emotions, but I managed. And it's nothing that can't be completely forgotten and laughed about in a night spent watching sports at Zembie's or Wii bowling. And it opens the door to show topics by the dozen.

The never-emptying inbox

You ever see those cartoons? The ones where the guy's at his desk and his outbox is empty and the inbox is overflowing? That's kind of how I feel right now.

Christmas is, well, three days away. It isn't that I don't know when Christmas is. It's not like it changes days on you. It's the same frickin' day every year. It doesn't sneak up on me.

Right now, I've got a million projects going on. Our show has really started to take off and that brings a whole new set of things to do for it. I was co-hosting another show on Fridays, and I got the chance to spin off to another show on a different network. I'm writing for the SportFellas and I'm going to be doing their radio show. I'm also taking on a few outside design projects because in the event that I decide to peace out, I have to refresh those skills. And they're fun.

Oh, wait. I committed to a triathlon in July in Chicago. The Danskin. We were going do to April in Orlando but opted to go to Chicago instead. I'm down with that. I've never been there.

Let's throw the Erie half-marathon on top of that. I think it's the weekend after.

You want more?

Harrisburg-Hershey half-marathon ... second weekend of November. I realize that's a hell of a long way down the road, but it's not like something you capriciously prepare for. You don't wake up that Saturday morning and say, "eh, I got nothing better to do, so I think I'll hit 13 miles today."

So between work, traveling, writing, radio, training ... sleep's a luxury. I tried going to bed really early last night but my mind was racing.

I neglected to send out Christmas cards and it's more because my life has been in such a state of transition during the last few months I didn't even think to ask for the Excel spreadsheet of addresses so I could send them. There's no tree. I didn't decorate. I just don't feel much like Christmas this year, and understandably.

In a few days, I'll be at home, on my parents' couch, watching their TV and relaxing. I'll take a minute or three to breathe and catch up, and then hit it again. Time's not slowing down for me, it seems. It's getting faster and faster.

... and I'm gonna be freakin' 29. Gah.

And it's time for me to call into my second network for the Christmas radio show. Then, I swear some down time with the TV.

Shameless self-promotion!!

Wait ... isn't that what a blog is anyway?

But, anyway ...

My weekend radio show, The Show That Never Ends, has been picked up by Alliance Media Network, a company who has partnered with us to bring us some awesome to our merry band of misfits. They partner with several other great shows on NowLive.com, so please visit their site and check out some of the fantastic talent the network has to offer!

Tonight's show promises to be a good one, though. We need your help to make this first show with them the best we've done so far (with the exception of "Porn Star or My Little Pony" which may never be topped) and that only can happen if you show up and participate. You can register for free for a chat name with NowLive and come in and hang out with us! You never know who's going to show up on any given night!

Oh, and don't forget -- Ed, our resident douche, isn't off the hook for his hair. And I'm not sure I could ring in 2008 any happier than knowing that while he's out trying to score with is popped collar on his dark striped shirt and his trendy jeans, he can't escape the fact that he's got no hair.

We want to thank all of you for your support! There's no way we'd be here now if it weren't for all of you. We're looking forward to making 2008 the best year yet for the show!

This is pretty awesome. I'm excited and freakin' out at the same time. And up to my ass in prep work right now. :) But I do hope that if you're around, and you've got the time, that you check us out tonight!

OK, common cold. You win.

(DayQuil -- fighter of the NyQuil! Champion of the sun!)

Nightman: What's wrong with you? You sound like hell.
Me: Oh, I'm fine. I'm not sick. I just can't breathe.
Nightman: You call a doctor yet?
Me: No! I'm not SICK. I just can't breathe.
Nightman: I don't know, Jacque. To me, "not being able to breathe" is something worth seeing a doctor about.

Monday is my cutoff. If I still can't breathe by Monday, I'm finally sucking it up and calling the doctor, where I'll lose $20 and about four hours of my time for her to see me for three minutes and write me a prescription.

I thought I was coming out of it, but in the last couple of days, my breathing capacity has severely diminished. And I'm back to the DayQuil and NyQuil. In a moment of genius yesterday, I became convinced I had allergies and went out and bought Claritin.

I'm clearly not a doctor.

Maybe it's stress. Maybe it's just the lack of an idle weekend at home. I traveled for something like four weeks straight -- Cincinnati, New Martinsville, Harrisburg, Hershey, Morgantown -- and although each of those trips were fantastic and fun, it didn't leave much time for rest with a cold that developed BEFORE I went to Cincinnati.

This weekend I've "grounded" myself. I'm not going out unless it's necessary, except for the gym. I know, I probably shouldn't even be working out, but I'm on a good streak lately and I feel bad when I miss it. And I love my gym. If you're one of my Charleston readers and you want a gym that you'll be in love with, I suggest Capitol Fitness. I giant heart how it's got great Pilates classes and it's never crowded. It also smells really nice, which was quite different than what I experienced at the Y on Tuesday night. Ick.

So, the grounding begins. I'm going to spend it on my couch watching movies in glorious high-definition quality and working on my show.

Speaking of my show, some very, very exciting new developments are in the works and it's HUGE! I don't want to talk a whole lot about it right now for fear of jinxing it, but it's VERY good and we're beside ourselves. Or, as co-host Jeff would say, we're "shitting rainbows."

Or, like my favorite Demotivator says: "Teamwork: A few harmless flakes working together can unleash an avalanche of destruction."

But now, I go fight the post office. Again. I f-ing lost a roll of stamps, and I'm still mad about it because I'd used TWO. That's $41.00 right out the window. Gah!!

Tonight's program is brought to you by ...

I feel like death. I'm not even kidding. Even though I had such an amazing time in Covington/Cincinnati, going on a trip like that and keeping the pace we did when you're already halfway to full-blown flu isn't the way to go.

Nevertheless, we're pressing on and having a show tonight because there won't be one next week. By the time 8 p.m. rolls around next Sunday, Julie and I are going to be center ice at a Hershey Bears game in Pennsylvania.

I could literally go to bed right this minute.

Reader mail (and Wednesday random)

I'm on the phone with Jeff right now, in an IM with Ben and listening to "Delilah" on the radio, which I leave on for Inky during the day so she's got some background noise. (Yeah, that's lame. Mock me if you want.) The song on now is "Night Shift" by Lionel Richie.

Verrrrrp.

Oh, but there's been redemption, because now we've got "Sara Smile" by Holland Oates.

You'll get that joke if you're a fan of "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia."

* * * * *

But on with the reader mail!

My sister, Ashlea, sent me this story, courtesy of our friends at FOXnews.com:

Woman Overheard Yelling Obscenities at Toilet Could Face Jail Time
Tuesday , October 16, 2007

SCRANTON, Pa. — A woman who allegedly shouted profanities at her overflowing toilet within earshot of a neighbor was cited for disorderly conduct, authorities said.

Dawn Herb could face up to 90 days in jail and a fine of up to $300.

"It doesn't make any sense. I was in my house. It's not like I was outside or drunk," Herb told The Times-Tribune of Scranton. "The toilet was overflowing and leaking down into the kitchen and I was yelling (for my daughter) to get the mop."

Herb does not recall exactly what she said, but she admitted letting more than a few bad words fly near an open bathroom window Thursday night.

Her next-door neighbor, a city police officer who was off-duty at the time, asked her to keep it down, police said. When she continued, the officer called police.

Mary Catherine Roper, an attorney with the American Civil Liberties Union in Philadelphia, took issue with the citation.

"You can't prosecute somebody for swearing at a cop or a toilet," she said.

Why is this story awesome? Where do I even start?

1. Who HASN'T yelled at an inanimate object like that? I must swear at objects a dozen or more times a day.

2. What are YOU going to do the next time your toilet overflows? Bet me money that you swear.

3. Douchebag off-duty cops.

4. ... Um, hello? The best part ... SCRANTON!

5. Ash, thanks for getting this week's Roundup segment ready for the show Sunday!

* * * * *

I'm starting to think Inky is possessed. Or at the least a little neurotic, which isn't bad given the girl who adopted her.

She's spent the last 30 minutes chasing both my gym bag (which hasn't moved) or her foot. She hisses at HER FOOT. I'm confused by this. That foot's never done you wrong, Ink.

* * * * *

Speaking of the gym, though, I'm still training for the triathlon in April. The last few weeks haven't been good on my gym schedule.

Truth be told, in the days following my separation, I didn't do much but lay around on the couch and watch TV. Then I traveled a little and came back to Charleston and I was living with a friend, so I didn't do a whole lot. It took me a week to get really settled into my new place and this is actually the first week I've been back into a routine of any sort.

That three weeks off was hell on my running endurance. You wouldn't think that three weeks off could affect your time like that, but it did for me. I just have to get back into it and get dedicated to it again. It'll be easier now, and I'm looking forward to the challenge.

Next after the Disney Danskin Tri is the Erie Half-Marathon, so you all should get your posterboard signs ready for that one. Oh, and your gambling money. Because after I run, we're totally tagging Presque Isle like it's our job.

* * * * *

I think it's bed time. I've got a few books that I got at Kanawha County Library's annual used book sale that I'm eager to rip into. I decided to not put a TV in my bedroom so I have a quiet place. The TV is too great a temptation when you're trying to sleep ... I'd rather pass out with a good book.

I also bought a composition book to write down my dreams ... if I could just remember them. So far, no luck.