I couldn't work anywhere else

My paper does this thing (that I don't love) that involves bolding proper names. People, businesses, etc. It's supposed to be done to enhance readability and because people who love themselves love not only seeing their names, but seeing their names in bold print.

This, however, has led to a continual debate over what gets bolded and what doesn't. Beth did a great job trying to come up with a styleguide for it, but questions still pop up.

Today:

"Do we bold Jesus?"

I came back into the room in the middle of the discussion, so they decided to ask me.

"Jacque!! Do we bold Jesus?"

"No!"

"Why not?"

"You won't bold Punxsutawney Phil, you're not bolding Jesus."

At which point Stirewalt jumps in and says, "But Jesus was a real person. He walked the earth. That can't be disputed."

Nobody seemed to buy into my belief that Punxsutawney Phil is real.

I eventually had to rule that in light of supporting evidence, Jesus is boldfaced.

I'm hopeful this prevents me from getting hit and killed by a piece of falling blue ice from a plane landing at Yeager today.

Also, today at work I learned that caffeine can mess up your prostate.

(Note to self: Be thankful you don't have a prostate!)

Lessons in Humility (Vol. 1)

Wednesday's trash day in my new neighborhood, so rather than get up 15 minutes earlier, I just get the trash together on Tuesday night. Tonight, I just finished cleaning out Inky's litter box when I put it on the ledge of the sink, turned my back and ...

Heard a thud.

The entire contents of the clean litter box were on the floor. I'm talking like two pounds of unused Tidy Cat For Small Spaces on the tile floor.

At this point, all I could do is stare. After a good 15 seconds, I started cleanup. I scooped most of it up with the dustpan, but then I broke out the DustBuster to get the rest. (Pilgrim voyage of the DustBuster!!)

I learned three things:

1. Just leave the f-ing cat box on the floor. Don't pick it up because you think sitting it on the edge of the sink will be more efficient.

2. The DustBuster is probably not intended to pick up all of that clay ... or whatever it is they make litter with.

3. When faced with laugh or cry, laugh. Because I know it may be hard to picture, but two pounds or so of cat litter scattered EVERYWHERE on your kitchen floor, after all, is very funny.