In this latest article, Lou ... Remember Lou?
You know.Lou.
And you shouldn't trust Lou because:
1. His name is Lou.
2. Hair!
3. Sunglasses.
Anyway ...
Lou says he regrets hawking their bedroom vids in anger. He was just mad that Amy was seeing Joey again (which, OK, I'm FOR you on that, Lou, I really am!) so he acted out in anger and decided that the only thing that would make him feel better during a divorce from a notorious woman would be cash and fringe fame.
Here's where I get real pissed ...
It's bad enough he sold it to a distributor. It's even worse that they got back together shortly thereafter and he didn't tell her about it UNTIL A MONTH OR SO AGO.
"I did it out of the heat of anger and passion," Bellera told The Post.
"We were estranged. She was seeing Joey. I was seething about the whole thing. It just came to a point where I was hurt and embarrassed by it . . . and it pressed the wrong button. I just used that as a vehicle to strike back at her."
You know what I'd use as my vehicle to strike back at you, Lou? A Sherman tank. With a big, giant, sharp, pointy knife on the end.
Fisher said she was willing to forgive her husband.
"We've been together for so many years and have had so many ups and downs," she said. ". . . I don't want to see it. It's better for me if I just don't think about it. I'm just going to hide in my house."
Amy, you're a better woman than I am. That man would be bleeding in the front yard in a few hundred pieces if I would have been on the receiving end of that. But, I'm hoping you take away a few lessons from this.
1. Videotape nothing ever, ever again. Lou hoses you once, Lou will hose you again.
2. Never underestimate guilt as a weapon.
3. You are totally in the clear to be as bad as you want for pretty much the rest of your life. If you're called out on it, you clearly have the response of, "Yeah, well, at least I didn't sell our sex tape."
Siiiiigh.
5 comments:
so to update the list, never trust guys:
with two first names
stand alone moustaches
named lou
flowing silver hair
Doh.
Jim (Ninja of the Mundane) left a comment asking if Amy is still hot.
However, I'm still in a NyQuil coma and just had to take the trash out, so I hit "reject" instead of approve.
Yes, Jim. Amy is still hot!
Yes, Nicole.
Also avoid people who have, or used to have mullets. At all costs.
There are so many wonderful parts of this post that I don't even know where to begin. Thank you, Jacque. You rock.
Remember, Angela ... A guy who looks like Lou (likely named Lou, perhaps Vinny) will break your heart every time.
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